June 27, 2016

“Raspberry Irsay”


Colts Owner Jim Irsay is known for his hobby of collecting music memorabilia, and Saturday he added a real gem to the collection: Prince’s Yellow Cloud Guitar. He paid $137,500 for it (sorry Luck, it came out of your paycheck) at an auction in Beverly Hills. So, can he use this new acquisition to his advantage? Maybe he can play inspirational songs in the locker room at halftime. Now let’s see, what would he play? “Throwing Under Pressure”? “You Could Never Take The Place of My Manning?” Maybe he’ll buy one of Frank Sinatra’s old microphones and sing “Luck Be Like Brady Tonight”.




 

“Sometimes Life Is Harden, Kid”


What is it with Pro athletes trying to show up kids these days? This is how you get Draymond Greens. Do you want Draymond Greens? Once, Pro basketball players used to encourage kids to do well, like in this 90’s style gem from Steve Nash:

Steve Nash Being Nice To Kids

Now we get this from James Harden:

James Harden Being A Jerk To A Kid

First of all…what is this, a magic show? Where did the ball go, you stupid kid? He should change the name of the program from “Harden Hoops” to “Hard-hearted Hoops”. The Rockets are still questioning why Harden didn’t do things like this during the regular season. This is why Dwight Howard is leaving Houston. Harden is taking away his gimmick: being known for his antics. Even worse, he runs up to the mob of kids and celebrates with them. It was as if James Harden had suddenly killed the Wicked Witch from Wizard of Oz, and the Munchkins were celebrating all around him. That kid will be made fun of for the rest of his life. Or, he will grow up to play for the NBA just so he can enter a game against Harden, and kick him in the groin.




 

“Attorney-Cleveland Privilige”


When you’re a lawyer, you don’t talk to anyone about your client’s case. Except the Associated Press.

wagging-finger-2
Image Credit: Newsguardians.com

I’m not buying attorney Robert Hinton’s claim that he accidentally sent a damning text about Johnny Manziel to the AP. Who the heck would send a text to saying, “Heaven help us if one of the conditions is to pee in a bottle”. His coach? Hue Jackson already knows Manziel has trouble hitting his target when under pressure. Also, who did he think he was texting? Aunt Polly? Oh, yeah, TOTALLY understandable mistake. Everyone spells out Associated Press in their phones, and shortens their relatives’ relation/first name to initials. I tried that once. Girlfriend: Who the hell is GF?!?!?! That’s not my number!!! Me: Oh, that’s my Grandmother Frances.

 

 

 

 




 

…and that’s My Three Cents

Sources:

1. “Raspberry Irsay”

http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000000671454/article/colts-owner-jim-irsay-buys-guitar-once-owned-by-prince?campaign=tw-nf-sf29706886-sf29706886

2. “Sometimes Life Is Harden, Kid”

http://deadspin.com/james-harden-owned-this-child-so-hard-he-will-never-gro-1782664625

3.  “Attorney-Cleveland Privilige”

http://deadspin.com/johnny-manziels-lawyer-withdraws-from-case-after-accide-1782670627

Featured Image Credit: stampedeblue.com

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